Lonely in a Crowded Room (and why God is enough)

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Is it possible to be lonely in a crowded room? Surrounded by like-minded people and still feel lonely?

That’s why I didn’t want to go to church recently. I knew that I would struggle to connect, just like I’ve struggled for the past 5 months. 

Settling into a new church is hard.

It’s been unusually difficult, even though I’ve never had problems getting plugged in before.

But God…

Right in the middle of my “wanna stay home” attitude, God pressed on my heart the tiniest bit of assurance that He had something for me; that His Word was going to touch my heart and not return void.

So we went to church. Got there a little early. Sat a little closer. Saw like-minded people filtering in. Until…

Once again, I found myself lonely in a crowded room.

My voice was barely above a whisper during the first couple of worship songs. On the verge of tears and inwardly crying out to God, I wasn’t able to sing. But by the time the worship team hit the first notes of What a Beautiful Name It Is, I melted.

Gone was the loneliness, the self-pity, the everything…but God.

Then, when the band got to my favorite part of the song, I could have shouted!

There is no rival,

There is no equal,

Now and forever, our God reigns.

Yours is the kingdom,

Yours is the glory,

Yours is the Name, above all names.

What a powerful Name it is

The Name of Jesus Christ my King!

But God…

Wasn’t finished.

He spoke through His Word and covered my lonely heart with the sweetest of comfort.

It is better to take refuge in the Lord than to trust in man…

The Lord is my strength and my song; He has become my salvation.
Glad songs of salvation are in the tents of the righteous.

Psalm 118:8,14&15

God will bring the connections I long for– in due time. I don’t have to rely on myself or others to fill the void. I can trust Him in this. 

So, what does this mean for us, dear sisters? It means that we can secure ourselves in the ONE UNFAILING POWER OF CHRIST and lean into Him during times of loneliness.

The stone which the builders rejected has become the chief cornerstone. This was the Lord’s doing; it is marvelous in our eyes. This is the day the Lord has made; we will rejoice and be glad in it. Psalm 118:22-24

Jesus knew more than anyone what it meant to be lonely and rejected. Yet, the Bible says again in Matthew 21:42 that it was the Lord’s doing and it was marvelous. Therefore, I will rejoice and be glad.

Have you ever felt lonely in a crowded room? Have you been assured by God during those lonely times?

Here are some of the lessons I’ve learned over the last few months.

1. God is enough.

This is the #1 thing that God has pressed on my heart again and again. He is allowing a deep longing in me that only He can fill. Even though I’ve always insisted that God is enough in my life, I don’t think I’ve ever been challenged by it.

God is enough. And it feels wonderful to finally let Him fill the voids I’ve previously filled with people.

2.   Patience is good.

Patience is the fourth fruit of the Holy Spirit mentioned in Galatians 5. However, it’s been the hundredth fruit in my impatient spirit!

God is working out His patience in me by closing doors of opportunity, holding me back when I want to run ahead, and saying “no” to some of the things I think I need.

Patience is good, therefore I will continue to show up, even when the results aren’t what I expect.

3.   He’s in the lonely.

I know, deep down, that God wants His children to connect with one another and live life together. The Bible is full of passages about unity in the body. For where two or more are gathered in His name, He is there. (Matthew 18:20)

But He’s also in the “lonely.” We have to believe that even when we don’t feel it, for without Him there’s no hope. I sometimes wish I could reach every lonely person, young and old, and tell them that they are never alone; that God is right there with them.

4.   I will sing again.

Since I’m being completely honest with all of you, I admit that part of my loneliness in a crowded room comes from the desire to serve. Worship ministry has been a big part of my Christian life from the very first day I accepted Christ back in 1987. I’ve rarely gone a few months without serving in my God-given talents.

But God reminded me today…TODAY…that I will sing again. He simply wants me to remain in step with His Spirit and stop running ahead.  In the depths of my soul, I know that He’s got this.

To everything, there is a season, a time for every purpose under heaven. Ecclesiastes 3:1

There is no doubt that the Lord inhabits the praise of His people. Therefore, I will sing again.

At my keyboard in the basement, I will sing.

As I walk the mountain trail, I will sing.

In sweet fellowship with friends over coffee, I will sing.

And if it is God’s will for me, I will sing again on a worship team.

So, there you have it, dear ladies. God is enough! And when you struggle to believe that, just wait patiently on Him to open wide your heart and fill every longing with Himself.

I also want you to know that I’m just an email away. In fact, why don’t we be lonely together? 

Below, are the links to some helpful resources. Feel free to share them with anyone you know who might feel lonely in a crowded room.

Jennifer

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22 Comments

  1. I’m deeply touched in my spirit. The Lord really needs to see my faith in trouble and hardship. The Lord is really faithful when we keep our covenant act. It’s good resource. May God bless you.

  2. I was moved and delighted to be taught these things…. I know exactly how you feel about being lonely in a crowd… All my life… And about being ” held back” or pruned… For the last few years the Lord has been doing that in me, due to health issues… But I still praise Him, not always , to be honest , but His truth remains my anchor, my hope, my peace. His love in my life is everything. May God bless you , really bless you, in all things… Abundantly! Sherri❤️🙏

  3. Jennifer, You, and God, blow my mind. Many years ago in a church, where I was born…again, something bad happened which tore the members apart and separated the congregation. We had no place to go…but those of us who were still together still had each other. Then the Lord moved my family and I 3,000 miles away. Away from the familiarity of a place where for generations our family lived. More so, we left those close brother and sister relationships from our church family. It has been 11 years now and have not found a “church” to belong to. Not that I haven’t tried. My family, my husband, myself and our two grown boys came to Christ when I Jesus brought me to that body of believers. I was saved first, then 10 years later, my husband. At this stage, I long for my husband to initiate where we should be. So, lonely…for our loved ones who “knew” us in Christ, longing for those intimate relationships, but where… Longing for God in that way again, as only you can get in with other believers… Been stuck for so long, though I have tried. Living in a place that is full of false religion. Born again churches are here, but seem to cater to those coming out of the cult. I’m at a loss.

    1. Praying for you and with you today, Carol! Thank you for sharing your heart. We are in this together!

  4. I love your songs
    Jennifer !
    For many years I have shared what God has inspired you to compose !
    Your songs have and will help people who are happy and sad!
    Thank you for sharing your heart !
    Thank you for gifting us and serving God in so many ways!
    Sing on sweet Jenny !
    You are appreciated!

  5. Lanetta, thank you so much for the heartfelt words! I sooo appreciate the reminder to use our talents in nursing homes. You are absolutely right–they love everything we do. What a blessing for them and for us.

  6. Amazingly true, and so well said. I love that God is in the lonely because we all experience it at one time or another in different ways. What a comfort to know He is always there working it out for our good. Praise Him forever!

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